Practical Steps toward Forgiveness
Daily Scripture
Ephesians 4:26-27, 29-32
26 Be angry without sinning [Psalm 4:4]. Don’t let the sun set on your anger. 27 Don’t provide an opportunity for the devil.
29 Don’t let any foul words come out of your mouth. Only say what is helpful when it is needed for building up the community so that it benefits those who hear what you say. 30 Don’t make the Holy Spirit of God unhappy—you were sealed by him for the day of redemption. 31 Put aside all bitterness, losing your temper, anger, shouting, and slander, along with every other evil. 32 Be kind, compassionate, and forgiving to each other, in the same way God forgave you in Christ.
Daily Reflection & Prayer
“Be angry without sinning” might feel a little vague for real life (“How do I do that?”), so Ephesians added timeless wisdom (equally helpful in family and political tensions): “Don’t let the sun set on your anger.” Your words can hurt or heal, and you get to choose which words you speak. Since we are not likely to always get the words just right, the passage reminded readers of God’s model of forgiveness: “Be kind, compassionate, and forgiving to each other, in the same way God forgave you in Christ.”
- “Anger is natural in communities because people hurt each other in various ways. But when this happens, Paul wants them to deal with it right away so that no one sins against another by feeding on that anger and doing further damage.” * A family is a small, intimate community. A nation is a large, diverse community. But in either case unchecked anger is a destructive force that builds barriers to insight and working together. How can you not allow the “sun to set” on your anger?
- Scholar N. T. Wright wrote, “People who are enslaved to anger and malice may think they are ‘free’ to ‘be themselves’, but they are in bondage. If we are marked out by the spirit’s personal presence living in us, think how sad it makes that spirit if we behave in ways which don’t reflect the life and love of God.” ** Before firing off angry words (in person or electronically), are you willing to ask, “Does this give grace? Does it build up? Can I picture Jesus saying this?”
Prayer
Loving Jesus, help me to speak and live so that words like “peace,” “unity,” “humility” and “love” will be the main qualities I show others, especially those closest to me. Amen.
GPS Insights
Gwyn Thomas
Gwyn Thomas, who serves in donor relations at Resurrection, wrote today's Insights blog. A Boston native. she moved to Kansas City in 2020. Her husband Blake is a Congregational Care Pastor at Resurrection Leawood and a provisional elder in the UMC. Her favorite pastimes include pottery, hiking, frisbee, trying new restaurants, and spending time with her two children and their large orange cat, Tuna.
I am mothering “2 under 2” these days. If you’re not in the know on the early childhood lingo, that means I have 2 children under the age of 2 years old. It’s a lot of diapers, a lot of snacks, a lot of time spent in a rocking chair in the middle of the night hours and a lot of BIG emotions. My little girls are figuring out how to get what they need. For my baby, that’s mostly sending out high pitched squawks and squeals. She is delighted when we respond to her with big smiles. My toddler is a different story as she is learning not just how to get what she needs, but what she wants. Her squawks have become pleas, and her squeals look a bit more like tantrums.
Every day, I do my best to be the type of mom I always wanted to be. I envisioned myself to be nurturing, calm, cuddly, and warm. To be honest, on my best days I feel like I accomplish at least 1 out of these 4 qualities. I have, however, found myself in multiple circumstances where I do not get it right. For example, I was home with my oldest when she was still learning to walk and wasn’t right beside her as she took a tumble. She looked up at me with tear filled eyes and I couldn’t help but blame myself for her pain.
I resonated with the churchwide survey shared in Pastor Adam’s message on Sunday revealing that many of us have a hard time forgiving ourselves. That extends beyond my motherhood experience and into my work life, marriage and personal decisions. I do think it’s because I want to be the best version of myself every day and find myself falling short of my own expectations. The imagery of carrying the backpack on our chests really struck me. When I am unable to let go of the rocks I am placing in my own bag, I am making it harder to be the person I want to be. We need grace for others, we need to ask for forgiveness from others, and we must not forget to give ourselves some grace as well.
Today, I am praying for the rocks you’re putting in your own bag. That you might find some time to reflect, take some out and lighten your load knowing that you’re doing your best and that God loves you.
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Scripture quotations are taken from The Common English Bible ©2011. Used by permission. All rights reserved.
References
* Timothy Gombis, study note on Ephesians 4:26 in The CEB Study Bible. Nashville: Abingdon Press, 2013, p. 369 NT.
** N. T. Wright, Paul for Everyone: The Prison Letters (Westminster John Knox Press, 2004, p. 55).
